Saturday, February 03, 2007

Making Poor Kids Cry Since 1976

One of the things I always wondered about come time for some sort of championship game was how they had the t-shirts and hats all ready for the winning team. Did they know who was gonna win? Was everything fixed? Or, as I found out as a teenager (and this sort of killed the excitement for me), they just make up the stuff for both teams so they're ready either way. So I sat on that knowledge for a few years till one day it occurred to me (ok, it was like 3 days ago), "What in the hell do they do with the loser's hats and t-shirts?"

I guess I always just assumed they threw the stuff out. But, and I'm sure I'm awfully late to this party, I found out that apparently what they do is send all the loser stuff to third world countries to help clothe the needy. Which, I think, is a great idea, a nice use of resources and a terrible way to prepare the people of those countries to ever appear on "Stump the Schwab," or some other such sports trivia type thingy.

Stuart Scott: "...finally homies, let's get busy meeting our third playa...all the way from Bangladesh, gimme a big Stump the Schwab boo-yah for Kamal! Kamal, this question is for you...who won Super Bowl XL?"

Kamal: "Ooh ooh, I know this one...this team is very popular back home in was the Seattle Seahawks!"

Stuart: "Oh, sorry dog, that is in-correct. Schwab, who was it?"

Schwab: "It was the Pittsburgh Steelers who beat the Seahawks."

Stuart: "That's why he's the man, ladies and gentlem...yo, Kamal, you got a question, dog?"

Kamal: "Um, yes. I'm pretty sure that Seattle is the correct answer. I am almost certainly very positive about this."

Stuart: "You better check ya-self, kid, the answer is the Steelers."

Kamal: "No, no, it is you who is to be checking himself, Mr. Boo-Yah; I know it is the Seahawks. I have a t-shirt back home that clearly states in no uncertain terms that the Seattle Seahawks were the champions of Super Bowl XL..."

Stuart: "Ok, how can I explain this to you..."

So, I guess my point about all this is that one day I hope to travel to the Sudan and have the opportunity to break some poor, malnourished kid's heart by explaining to him that it was indeed the Chicago Bears, and not the Indianapolis Colts that were the champions of Super Bowl XLI. While I'm there, though, I'm totally gonna get a New England Patriots 2006 AFC Champions sweatshirt...that'd be super sweet.


Blogger Peter N said...

You're back...I got my wish!

9:40 AM  

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