Monday, December 04, 2006

An Open Letter To Those Who Will Determine the Success of My Very First Red Sox Season

Dear Theo & co.

In the day and a half I've been alive, it's come to my attention that in the last couple years some of your decisions have been, as my dad would say, "Jesus! You have got to be kidding me..."

Thankfully, I was born just before the 2006 winter meetings started, so I'm here to give you the following five pieces of advice:

1. If you're gonna give four years/$40mil to another shortstop, can you please make sure he's more emotionally mature than I am?

2. J.D. stands for Just Don't.

3. Under no circumstances is Dougie allowed back in the building. Just let it go.

4. Under no circumstances can you not at least ask the Padres about getting Dave Roberts back; you owe my dad at least that.

5. When you trade Manny, do us all a favor and hide Willy Mo in his luggage, ok?

Thanks, your newest fan,



Anonymous Anonymous said...

The Wee One is YEARS WISER Than The F O.

4:25 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

& even he realizes that Tim Mc Carver is a babbling, braying, blohard of a baboon.

1:56 PM  
Blogger Peter N said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

10:11 AM  
Blogger Peter N said...

WOW!!! Be so happy...I'm proud. The next generation, right before our loving eyes!

10:13 AM  
Blogger Christine E. said...

Congratulatons Gareth--and welcome to the world..:-)

2 days only, and alrady smater than 1/2 of baseball...

Congrats to your mom and dad too..

6:28 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Ouch. A little rough, don't you think?

8:18 PM  
Blogger MattySox said...

Well, Mike, I was on about an hour's sleep at that point, and Gareth is an opinionated young man; I didn't feel the need to introduce to him the idea of journalistic censorship at such a young and impressionable age...

9:47 PM  

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